We've all seen Star Wars, right?
Sure, there might be some rogue soul out there that has never visited Dagobah or doesn't know what Huttese is or can't grasp why the term "blue milk" always gets a laugh at parties, but the majority of us have all traveled to that galaxy far, far away countless times.
However, with two trilogies released out of chronological order, and a new set of spin-offs looking to complicate the timeline even further, it's not always easy to know how to actually watch the Star Wars saga anymore.
Do you do it in the order George Lucas intended? Do you watch them in the order they were released? Are you one of the backwoods survivalists that pretends the Prequels don't exist and stopped caring about the franchise back in '99?
Or are you a complete nihilist that watches when you want and how you want, because you just want to see the world burn?
These are the types of white-knuckle questions that will sustain message board arguments until the sun burns out, so it's only logical that we take a stab at it.
The order you decide to watch the Star Wars saga can actually say a lot about your personality, and here are your best options.
Saga Order
Order: Episodes I-VII*
Personality Type: You play by the rules and respect chronology. You might be boring.
Opinion of George Lucas: You love him and everything he's given us but are willing to give this J.J. Abrams character a chance.
Release Order
Order: Episodes IV-VI, I-III, VII
Personality Type: You appreciate movie history and were probably born before 1980.
Opinion of George Lucas: "He used to be good."
The "Oh Man, You Really Hate The Prequels" Order
Order: Episodes IV-VI
Personality Type: You're a hardliner that sticks by your convictions. Also, you're jaded.
Opinion of George Lucas: He retroactively ruined your childhood.
The "Oh Man, You Really Hate The Prequels But Kinda Like The New Stuff" Order
Order: Episodes IV-VII
Personality Type: You used to be jaded, but BB8 melted your heart. You also probably have kids.
Opinion of George Lucas: You use him as a cautionary tale to your children about the dangers of hubris and flannel.
The Machete Order
Order: Episodes IV, V, II, III, VI
Personality Type: You're incredibly meticulous and passionate about your Star Wars fandom. You also hate Jake Lloyd.
Opinion of George Lucas: "The movies belong to the fans, man."
The Masochistic Order
Order: Episodes I-III
Personality Type: You're a lunatic
Opinion of George Lucas: You're outside of his house right now, fogging up his windows with your craziness.
The Newb Order
Order: Episode VII
Personality Type: You're five years old.
Opinion of George Lucas: Look him up on Wikipedia.
* I know The Force Awakens is technically not titled Episode VII, but I'm too set in my ways. Deal with it.
